Review – Amadeus, National Theatre

Well, we went in humming Falco’s “Rock Me Amadeus” and we were still humming it on the way out.

This despite the 20 pieces of the Southbank Sinfonia who bang out Mozart’s music throughout the three long hours of Peter Shaffer’s Amadeus, interact with the actors, occasionally having a stab at acting themselves, ripple like waves on the stairs of what constitutes a set and donning party hats to become part of the action.

If you don’t have a ticket you’re unlikely to get one for its current booking period now. It was practically sold out before the fairly spectacular reviews were delivered. But don’t despair, you need some good news this morning, it didn’t quite work its magic on us.

The 2012 Whingie Awards – the very worst and the not so bad

Inappropriately, since it was the Olympic year, we’re a bit late off the starting blocks with our highly-anticipated annual Whingie Awards.

Frankly we believed we might not need to bother. The world was going to end. Andrew had packed his onesie and headed off to Bugarach. Phil was left sitting around in his meggins self-medicating in preparation musing which shows would be the theatrical cockroaches that might survive the impending apocalypse.

The Mousetrap obviously, Phantom and The Woman in Black no doubt, though perhaps Viva Forever! should hunker in a bunker and pray.

Of course it wasn’t the end after all. The world continues and we must carry on going to the theatre. It’s a bit of a let down. But as we toast the new and possibly unlucky New Year of 2013 we’ve had our hands down the back of the theatrical sofa digging for the occasional treasure, copious amounts of fluff and the occasional best-forgotten unmentionable.

Review – Constellations, Duke of York’s Theatre

We caught this before its Evening Standard Best Play Award had had time to gather any dust and it was a treat to see the Duke of York’s full.

The latest transfer from the Royal Court Theatre, Nick Payne‘s Constellations is a romance between a beekeeper Roland (Rafe Spall) and a quantum physicist Marianne (Sally Hawkins).

It takes string theory (the existence of several extra dimensions to the universe that have been compactified into extremely small scales, in addition to the four known spacetime dimensions -gettit?) to imply that there are almost identical versions of us out there somewhere in the multiverse, living subtly nuanced variations of our lives in endless permutations. Think Sliding Doors to infinity and beyond.

Review – Stovepipe, West 12 Shopping Centre, Shepherds Bush

Yes, you read that correctly, the Whingers went shopping last night.

Well sort of. Despite Andrew’s protestations that he just had to to pop into Argos, desperately needed an item from Doctors Surgery and that Old Boot Shoe Repairs really had Phil’s name on it, Phil dragged him past them all to one of the growing number of retail units that have had to look for new sources of income.

Yes, it’s a sure sign of how deep the recession is cutting at the West 12 shopping centre in Shepherds Bush that one of its former shops has been converted into a theatre foyer. Well theatre in the loosest sense. It’s not theatre as the Whingers know it.