Jerusalem – The Musical!?

The Whingers hear lots of idle tittle tattle but they rarely bother to write about it either for complex legal reasons or more often through laziness. For the price of a drink they will usually end up passing on such titbits by oral means to anyone who will listen with the pre-amble “We didn’t tell you this but..”.

However some news is just too darn extraordinary not to broadcast and our extremely reliable showbiz mole (no, not Baz B.) has furnished us with something of an exclusive – just remember that you heard it here first.

Apparently producer Sonia Friedman, buoyed up by the successes of Legally Blonde and Jerusalem, is planning to stage a musical version of Jez Butterworth‘s multi-award-winning smash-hit play.

Jerusalem Opening Night Party

Yes, we know what you’re thinking.

What are you two doing hob-nobbing like this? Are the Whingers selling out? But before you click onto other sites let us modestly remind you that we were the ones who hailed Jerusalem and Mark Rylance’s performance before the “legit” critics jumped onto the Whingers’ rickety old band wagon (it is well known that they slavishly follow the Whingers’ opinions and have no capacity for independent thought apart from Michael Billington who thinks Jerusalem and Really Old Like Forty Five are both four star experiences which just goes to show the perils of independent thought).

Anyway, we went.

The Critics’ Circle Theatre Awards 2009

Well, the fire door had been carelessly left open so like model citizens we went in and pulled it firmly shut behind us and then it turned out we were in the Price of Wales Theatre and there was free drink and Rachel Weisz and Jude Law were and so we thought, what the hell, and stayed for The Critics’ Circle Theatre Awards 2009.

Of course, it’s pretty much the definition of “yesterday’s news”* (well, you try filing a blog post when they’ve been topping up your wine glass not stop for for three hours and to be fair Andrew was tweeting it live) and so you know that Weisz and Law were among the winners. We sort of guessed that when we saw them there.

The Whingers Awards 2009 – the very worst and the not so bad

With another year rapidly drawing to a close it is time for the Whingers to reflect and indulge themselves in a little more navel gazing – not our own navels, as that would be even duller than usual for you – but the innies and outies of the sometimes fluffy navels of London’s artistic directors, producers, players and theatres and award The Whingies to the most outstanding ones.

But first our own navels: 2009 has been a year of heady excitement for the Whingers. It was a year that saw them inadvertently whip up controversy and heated debate again and again and again.

It was also a year in which artistic differences reared their ugly heads threatening the very fabric of the West End Whingers, a tear in the polyester bed-sheet of their existence so delicate that a clumsily clipped toenail might have been all it took to rent it from headboard to toe straight down the middle.

The Whingers were courted by the British Broadcasting Company, libelled as “muckrakers” in the National Press, lampooned in song and Phil had his pithiest aphorism to date quoted (yet mainly without attribution) by national critics. There was an evening of confusion in which Phil was mistaken for Michael Grandage and the Whingers finally received an award for their artistic endeavours.

And we finally got the opportunity to choose between the Merlot and the Marlowe.

So, without further do, here are the results of the Kentish Town and Vauxhall juries:

Review: Jerusalem by Jez Butterworth, Royal Court

Six hours of theatre? Three intervals? Have the Whingers lost the plot, or just watched so much theatre they can’t keep up with it?

OK so we’re conflating a little having sat through a matinée of Carrie’s War before heading trepidatiously to The Royal Court to see the epic Jerusalem.

We had been tipped off by some Good Samaritans beforehand that Jez Butterworth‘s play comes in at a staggering 3 hours 20 minutes with two intervals. Christ! We could have flown to the holy city in less time. To be honest the runes were not looking auspicious and the Whingers were on their knees praying to the God of theatre (why has he foresaken us?) to intervene with some technical problem which would necessitate the whole thing being called off and refunds given.